Miriam Grossman Shoah Foundation Testimony

November 21, 1995. Survivor,  Miriam Grossman. Interviewer,   Ben Nachman. Omaha, Nebraska. Language, English. My name is Ben Nachman, interviewing Miriam  Grossman. Omaha, Nebraska. November 21, 1995. Can you give me your name, please?

My name is Miriam Grossman.

And how do you spell your last name? 

G-R-O-S-S-M-A-N.

And where--   where were you born? Where were you born?

I was born in a city by the name Konin. 

And where was this?

It was May the 8th, 1916. 

In what country?

In Poland. 

In Poland. Did you come from a large family? 

Yes, very large family.

Can you describe your family for me? 

My immediate family? I had-- I am one of  nine children. Should I give you the names?   The eldest is Braunia, then Moisha [? Wolf,  ?] a-- a brother. And then Gita, or Guta,   a sister. And then Miriam, I. And Yetka, or  Yenta, another sister. And then brothers again,   Gershon Zelig, Gecel, Yisrael, and Leibish.

And where did you fit in with   the children, in what order?

Almost in the middle. 

Was your father born in the same town?

No, my father was born in Grabow,   I think, a small town.

Do you know how to   spell that name?

G-R-A-B-O-W. 

And where was your mother born?

I don't know. But I think in Konin. 

In Konin.

I think. 

Was your family a religious family?

Yes. 

You attended synagogue regularly?

Yes, they were religious. They were   traditional. We observed the--  the traditional Jewish things. 

In the home?

In the home. And my   father was a-- a-- a religious man, and a  very wise man. He studied. All the time,   he studied. But he wasn't well. So my mother help  him out in the store, so he will not overdo, and   be able to take care of the children's behavior.

What kind of a store did he have? 

We had a double store. My bubbe had a half,  and we had a half. She had materials, and we had   glassware, silverware, pottery, things like that.

How was your family   economically during this time?

Middle-class people. We were very   careful. We couldn't afford many thing, but it was  no tragedy. We-- we were a middle-class people. 

Did the family all help in the store?

Not the whole family. The-- the boys were   educated in Jewishness. And two, two or three of  the children were helping in the store. And the   others went in school, and so on, and so on.

Did you go to school? 

Yes, there was a gymnasium, and-- but  it was just the beginning of my education. 

How long did you attend this school?

I don't remember. But not enough. I   didn't finish it.

You didn't? 

There is no question. INT:   How long did you live in Konin?

My god, I just don't remember.   Dates don't cling in my mind.

Did you move from Konin? 

From Konin, we moved to Lodz, to a big city.

And how do you spell that name? 

L-O-D-Z.

And you lived   there. Where you're growing up in Lodz?

Yes, we were growing up there. We were   working there, helping out our parents.  And we had some relatives there, too. 

Did your father still have a store in Lodz?

No. No, we had to help to support the family. 

Did your father continue  his Jewish studies at that time? 

Yes, he didn't give up. He had  to work too, the things he could   do at home. But he did not give up studies.

Did you attend synagogue regularly in Lodz? 

I did not regularly go to synagogue,  but for the holidays, my father was. 

Do you remember the years you lived in Lodz?

No, it's hard for me to get out the years.   Numbers, years is hard for me.

Was your livelihood as   good in Lodz as it had been in Konin?

I can't make a comparison. It was different. 

Were any of your brothers  and sisters married at this time? 

At which time?

When you lived in Lodz. 

Yes, they married in Lodz. They married-- my  older sister and the other sister and a-- and a   brother, and another brother, eventually married.

Did they have children? 

No. One of my brothers lived a little  further from Lodz, and he had one child when   the-- when the war broke out.

Do you remember the   name of the city he lived in?

No, I tried to remember, and it just   didn't come to me. It was close to Lodz.

During this time,   was Lodz a-- a very Jewish city?

Yes, [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] a very   Jewish city, and a-- [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS]  a city where you could work or have a store,   make a living, and develop, and many opportunities  for people who could afford. It was a big city. It   was the second largest city in Poland.

How large a city was it? 

[LAUGHS] I don't know. I can't tell you.

Was the Jewish percentage very large? 

Yes, mostly.

The city was mostly Jewish? 

Mostly, to my understanding.

Did the Jewish people tend   to live in a specific area?

Well, this is natural, yes,   but not like in a ghetto. Because  there were so many Jews, that they   had to live everywhere. But some groups were  concentrated, and some of them were dispersed. 

During this period, were  you active in any organizations? 

No. We just were kind of brought up properly  at home, and we helped to work a little bit,   to help our parents. And we had some relatives.  So it was a comfortable life. For my parents,   of course, it wasn't so easy. But  for the children, we didn't complain. 

Can you describe your home for me?

Oh, my dear. There was a hall and a kitchen,   and a-- a big room, and a smaller room,  and a-- a restroom, and a big, great,   [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] how to say? When you  go out from a house, you have a-- a veranda,   something like that. It was a comfortable home.

Was it a-- was it an-- an individual home,   rather than an apartment?

It was an apartment,   but it was a big apartment. It was a-- a-- a whole  cluster of apartments, and this was one of them,   on a first-- on a-- a second floor.

Did your family own this apartment? 

No, we just paid rent.

What occupations were your   brothers involved with at this time?

Well, they were helping Daddy in   making gloves out of-- out of thread.

Did they do this in the home? 

In the home, yes.

And who did they sell these gloves to? 

They didn't sell it. They had it from a  factory, and the factory paid them for the work. 

During the late '30s, when did you start  noticing changes, or did you, in Poland,   as you approached the war years?

This was a-- a very sudden   thing in Poland. It came, like, overnight--  a blitzkrieg. [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] There   were bombs [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] thrown on  Poland. And it was a-- a very quick overtake   from as-- of the German-- from the German.

Was anyone in your family in the military? 

No. But after the war, my-- one  of my brothers went to the military. 

When-- after this blitzkrieg,  was your city occupied? 

Right away.

And occupied by whom? 

By the German, by the Nazis.

Did you notice any   difference in the treatment at this time?

Of course. We couldn't go out. We were   afraid. We were taken out from-- from the houses,  many people. And they did that with a very great   speed. And they took us right away into a ghetto. They-- they want to empty the Lodz and put them   all separate, in a ghetto. And we didn't  know the reason. But then-- and we found   out that the reason was to destroy us, eventually,  because they couldn't just destroy us singularly.  And they had a-- made wire, you know, the--  there were wires around the ghetto so we   couldn't run away. And we couldn't take  anything more than we could handle. And   we left everything. We had to leave everything. And they just pushed us in wherever there was   a-- a little opening. And you can imagine  so many thousand people in a small area, on   the outskirt of a city. It was just horrible. We  just didn't know what's going on. We were stupor. 

During this period, did the-- this happen  gradually, that they put people into the ghetto? 

As soon as possible. They were rushing us.

Did you leave your home to go to this ghetto? 

We had to.

The ghetto was located in   an area different than your home.

Yes. 

Was it distant from you, a long distance?

It was quite a distance. And we-- and we   couldn't have any transportation. We had to  walk. And we were just in a stupor. We just   didn't know what's going on.

Were you assigned places   to live in the ghetto?

Pardon me? 

Were you assigned  places to live in the ghetto? 

No, wherever we could find a-- a hole, then  they-- they-- they just pushed us. Wherever   there was a-- a-- a place empty, they pushed  us. And they, in certain times, they-- they   pushed several families in one-- in one room. It's  impossible to describe the-- the life in ghetto. 

Was your family together at this time?

No. My-- [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] my older   sister, myself, and my younger sister,  and two of my brothers. And the others,   they were either in-- married, you know,  or in-- lived in a-- in a different hole. 

But the entire family was in the ghetto?

Entire family. Not only ours,   but whatever they could grab.

Were you able to see the other   members of your family in this ghetto?

Very seldom, because we were afraid   to even move around.

What did you do in   the ghetto? Did you have a job?

I tried to help people in a   hospital. I was a nurse. I-- I- I was a nurse.  In Lodz, I began my nursing career. But when--   when I was in the ghetto, I was working  in a hospital as a-- as a nurse already.   And-- and I had my floor of patients.  And-- and I remember it very pleasantly,   because I helped a lot of people in the hospital.

Were these people that were in the ghetto   that were in this hospital? People that lived  in the ghetto, were they in this hospital? 

Yes, only, because there was-- Lodz  was cleaned up of Jews. All the Jews were   in the ghetto. And because there was such a  overpopulation, so every day, they took a-- a   bunch of people, and they told them they are  gonna take to work. But they took them away,   and we found out later that they destroyed  them, to make room. Just-- just so [INAUDIBLE]. 

Do you know where they took these people?

We didn't know. We were in a-- in circle,   and we didn't know. But some people said  that they are taking them to destroy. But   who wanted to believe that?

Did you have adequate   food when you were in the ghetto?

No, we had rations. We had to stay   in a row and get the ration. And-- and the--  the longer it take, the less food we got. And   my father and my mother didn't have enough food. And they were sick. And we couldn't get medication   for them. And we couldn't get enough food for  them. And they just, [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] how   to say? [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] Were  undernourished and no medication. They   were sick. And eventually, they died.

While in the ghetto? 

Yes.

You mentioned that you worked as a nurse. 

Yes.

Were you being trained   as a nurse, or had you gone to school to learn?

I was a nurse before the-- the-- before the   Germans take off-- took off-- took--  before the blitzkrieg. I was young,   but I did like nursing. And--  and I started my-- my nursing   career right before the- the war. But I was very  able and capable, and I was a-- a-- a nurse in   the ghetto, and a very reliable one.

Were you trained to be a nurse,   or were you learning on the job?

Oh, partially this way, and partially   that way. We did have a monitor. And-- and we  have the experience right away, on the job too. 

Did you have classroom work?

I don't know if you can call it classroom,   but there was time to-- to [PAUSES  FOR 3 SECONDS] teach us the methods. 

How long were you working as a  nurse before you went into the ghetto? 

Not too long. Not too long.

Now, during your time in the ghetto, were   you able to maintain contact with your family?

Yes, I was living with them. We were sleeping   on the floor on-- on mattresses or-- or straw,  whatever it is. We had terrible conditions,   but I was-- we were working 12 hours a  day, and then 12 hours a night. But we   were in our places. From there, we went  to work, and from work, we come home. 

Can you give me an idea of what  a daily food ration was in the ghetto? 

I don't remember exactly, but there's the--  a-- a-- a portion of bread, and some potato,   and [PAUSES FOR 4 SECONDS] I don't know. I  don't remember. I-- I just don't remember,   but I know it was very scarce, very scarce.

Can you describe the   ghetto for me at this time?

How can I describe it? It's-- people were   frustrated. People were-- they didn't know  what happened. They didn't know what to do.   It was just a-- a terrible situation.

Were children kept with their   families during this period?

I don't think that they   made a-- a-- a special plan  for it, but some children did,   and some children didn't.

Do you have any idea   how many people were in the ghetto?

No, I don't know the numbers,   but I know that-- that there were so many  people that they were almost [? growing ?] one   on the other. But they were relieved every day,  because every day, they took so many people away,   and told them that they are taking them to the--  to work. But they took them to the-- to destroy. 

While you were in the ghetto, did  you have some sort of identification? 

Not that I recall.

Were you ever able to walk   around the ghetto when you weren't working?

We were afraid, because the Germans,   soldiers, were walking around and see  that nobody will smuggle out. So we were   afraid of them. We did, but very little.

By doing this, were you able to see   the rest of your family that were  located other than where you lived? 

Very seldom. We are afraid.

How were the Polish people   toward you at this time?

We didn't have any   contact with them. They were happy, I'm sure,  because they had a profit. We had to leave   everything behind, and they had a profit.

When you left everything behind,   was your apartment closed off at that  time? The apartment where you lived, was   it closed off when you were taken to the ghetto?

I don't know what they did. They just says,   out of here. And I-- I even want to  take some pictures from the wall,   and they didn't let me. Out. They were with  the bayonets, with the, you know, and speed.   And they- they did that to-- to confuse us.

The guards in the ghetto, were they all   German guards?

Who? 

The guards in the ghetto.

The guards were-- yeah. There-- there   was a-- a group of Jewish policemen, but it was  just like a play. There was the eldest of Juden,   the one who is over the ghetto. But he  played more to the Germans than to the Jews,   because he was afraid of himself, too.

Do you remember who he was? 

I knew. I forgot.

And the Jewish police,   how were they toward You? How did they treat you?

Well, we didn't get into their-- into their   way. They just-- I think that they,  themselves, didn't know what to do.   They wanted to be lenient, and they had to  show that they are in charge, and so on. 

You said that your mother and father were  both undernourished in the ghetto. Can you tell me   what happened to your mother and father?

They died. 

In the ghetto?

In the ghetto. And   it was so bad. We didn't have it-- we didn't even  have people to-- to dig the graves and wash the--   the dead. And I and another lady, we were washing  my mother. I remember, I was washing my mother,   taken off a-- a door from-- from the house,  putting the dead Mama on there, and-- and washing   her off. It was horrible things. INT:  November 21, 1985. Interview with survivor Miriam  Grossman. Mrs. Grossman, you were telling me about   washing your mother's--

1985? 

1995.

'95, yeah. 

You were telling me about washing your  mother's body in preparation for burial. Can   you tell me more about that story?

Well, there is nothing to tell   anymore. We had to bury the body. So--  and we didn't have people to do that. So   in many families, people had to do it themselves,  with a friend or with a neighbor, and-- and then   bury them many times by themselves.

Was there a cemetery? 

There was a cemetery, yes.

And you were able to bury   your mother and your father in this cemetery?

I think so, yes. There was-- there was a   bigger cemetery than the ghetto itself.

Was that cemetery preserved,   or was it destroyed?

I don't know. 

How long were you in this ghetto, in Lodz? 

Oh my God. Again, the dates. [PAUSES FOR 3  SECONDS] A few years. [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] No,   not so many. [PAUSES FOR 4 SECONDS] I  don't remember. [PAUSES FOR 5 SECONDS]   But a-- a few years-- three or four. [PAUSES  FOR 5 SECONDS] Three or four. I don't remember. 

Did conditions get worse as the time went on?

Yes. 

They did.

And in the--   in the hospital where I was working, we didn't  have enough medication. We didn't have enough   beds. People were laying on the-- in the hall, and  so on. It-- it was a-- it was a terrible thing. 

Of the members of your family, you said  that you lost your mother and your father   in the ghetto. Did you lose any other  members of your family in the ghetto? 

I didn't see them die.

But you do feel that you lost some members? 

Yes, because I-- they were taken away.

Who was taken away? 

The Germans.

No,   which members of your family were taken away?

Oh, my oldest sister with his-- her husband,   and my brother with his wife, and several  children, and another brother. They were-- [PAUSES   FOR 9 SECONDS] I just can't concentrate anymore.

This was-- you were still in the ghetto   when they were taken away?

Yes, but we didn't see it.   Because when they were in different places,  we just came over, and they were gone. 

And you haven't heard from them ever again?

No. 

Did you stay the rest  of the time in this ghetto? 

Not the rest of the time. I was in the-- in  the hospital, working, yes. But as time went on,   they cleaned out the ghetto too. People died on  the street. People died in their houses. And--   and they-- and-- and-- and I was working  in the hospital in-- in such a condition,   that a-- a person cannot even imagine. And when the time came, they-- they want   to clean up completely the ghetto. So  they-- I was left with two brothers and   one sister. [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] And--  and the other ones were already gone.  And-- and they came-- they vacated the  houses, and they came over. And they said,   out you go. Come down. And the-- and we-- you  are going-- you are going to take just the   most necessary thing on your self, and you go to  work. And when we came down, they took us on-- on   a-- a horse and buggy, and out of the ghetto.  And on-- on the [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] cattle   trains, they took us to Auschwitz.

Do you remember the cattle train   itself? Can you tell me something about that?

It was horrible, because there was no place to   sit. There was no windows. They were the despair  people-- people in despair. We didn't know what's   going on. We didn't know where we're going. We  just-- we just thought that we were going to work.  But we came to Auschwitz. And they said, throw  everything down, and go into this room. There   was a shower room. And-- but before that, they  shaved off all our hair. And my sister-- yeah, and   they-- they separated the men from the women. They  took away my brothers, and my sister came with me. 

How long were you on the  train going from Lodz to Auschwitz? 

I-- I can't tell you, but it was a  long way. It was a-- a-- a terrible way. 

Were you given any food?

No. And so they-- they told us   to throw away everything, throw down everything on  a pile, and they shaved the head. And when your--   a woman is shaved head, she looks different. I didn't even know that my sister is staying   with me. And I said, where-- Yetka, where are  you? Where are you? She say, I'm here. Excuse me.  So anyway, they took us through the shower  room, and on the other side they took us out   on the other side of the-- of the shower room. And  they said, take one piece of cloth-- of clothes,   and that's all. And they-- they took us into horse  stalls, and there we were waiting. And we didn't   know why, and what for, and whatever.  And it was terrible. It was terrible.  They beat us. And they-- [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS]  they-- they just want to destroy us. That's all.   But they couldn't put everyone into a-- into the  chambers all together, so we had to wait our--   our [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] line. So-- and this  is-- this was every day we came to the counting,   how to say? You said that word.

The appell? 

Appell, yeah. We had to stay on the  appell every day, and so on, until--   until the time came. And it was-- suddenly, we  hear that it was close to the end of the war,   and the German women were needed in the front  to defend-- to defend them. So they had to take   them out of factories. So they needed a few--  200 girl, I think, to supply-- to replace them.  And I remember there was a-- a-- a table,  and there were the Germans sitting. And   we had to be naked completely. And Mengele  came with his [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] whip,   and pointed out. This one goes here.  This one goes here. This one goes here.  And my sister and-- two sisters and--  and a-- a cousin had to go one way,   and I had to go the other way. And I didn't  know what for and where. And then we found   out that they took the other ones on a truck, and  they, naked as they were, pushed him so tightly,   that to-- to have more, more. And they took  him away, of course, to the gas chamber. And I,   with some other which were-- which were  chosen to work, so they took us separate. 

When you first arrived in Auschwitz, how  many members of your family were with you? 

Four or five. But my-- my brothers  were separate. But the girls, we were four,   I think, because there was a cousin too.

Did you last see some members of your   family in Auschwitz?

Did I what? 

Did-- some members of your family, did  you see them for the last time in Auschwitz? 

Yes.

Who were they? 

Those who were with me. Only I was separated  to go to work, and the others to destruction. 

Were you the only survivor of your family?

Yes. 

What kind of work did  they send you off to do? 

In a factory, where they make little  reels for airplanes, with a looper on the--   on the eye. This was the-- the job I had.

Was this in a factory near Auschwitz? 

Yeah.

And how did you get to this factory? 

Well, we were known-- this was on the  [NON-ENGLISH], on the [NON-ENGLISH] from   Auschwitz-- from Austria to-- by Czechoslovakia,  close to Czechoslovakia. We went on a train. We   got a piece of bread, and we went on  the train. And we came to a factory,   and this was the factory. And I was by myself.

And you didn't return to Auschwitz after   this?

No. 

Then you-- can you tell me what  kind of work you did in this factory? 

That what I am telling  you. The reels for airplanes. 

And how were conditions in this factory?

Not very pleasant one. We slept on the   floor on-- with the-- with the straw. And--  and we did take-- we did have two meals,   and very, very simple. And we just exist.

How long were you in this factory? 

I don't remember, because then the war was  very near to a close. And-- and they-- and--   and when we were on the appell,  I fainted. And when I fainted,   then they considered me for-- for the destruction. There was a-- a-- a-- a little edge with the   straw, and people who could-- who-- who--  who-- who were getting sick, or whatever,   they were thrown over there. And you couldn't  see what's going on. And there-- there,   they died. This-- this was a place  where they throw them in to die before   they can take 'em away to the gas chamber. So--

Was the-- was this located near this factory? 

Yes, this was in the factory, was  a-- a-- a place. And-- and I was there,   and-- and when I came to me, then I heard-- I  heard some voices, some laughter, some happy   voices. And I didn't know what's going on. So I-- I couldn't get up. So I rolled myself   to a little slit to see what's going on.  And they were Russian soldiers embracing   girls and having-- you know, laughing  and-- and-- and giving them things,   and so on. So I fainted again. And finally, I  found out myself-- I find myself in a hospital.   And this was the first thing of my rescue.

This was from the Russians? 

From the Russians.

And you were placed   in a hospital under Russian care?

I think I then-- it was with   the sisters, you know. No, it was rather  Czechoslovakia. It was rather Czechoslovakia,   because it was on the border.

How long were you in this hospital? 

I don't know how long. But when I recovered a  little, they sent me to Karlsbad for recuperation.   So I-- I was just like in a stupor, just sent  from one place to another. And I didn't know   where and what. You couldn't think then. You  were just thrown, moved, and things like that.  And when I was recuperated a little, then I heard  that they are a group of people in Czechoslovakia,   in Karlsbad, and in Prague, that they go to  Israel. So-- and-- and we had-- I didn't have   a number, because I was designated to the chamber. So they gave us a-- a little ticket, that   we are the survivors, so we didn't have to pay.  And this way I came to Prague. And-- and from   there, we were trying to get to-- to Israel to--  we had to smuggle through Hungary, just a group of   people. And we couldn't get through, because there  were Russians on the-- on the [NON-ENGLISH], and   they said, either you give us vodka, or you give  us money. Otherwise, we won't let you through.  We didn't have anything, so they sent  us back. And when they sent us back,   they sent us back to the English DP camp. And  the Englander treated us very badly. So there   were a group of young people, and they said,  we heard that an American zone is much better.  So they went there, and they took me with  them. And we came to the American zone,   smuggling. And when I-- we came to the DP camp  where we-- Bindermichl. And I was completely in   a stupor. And I didn't know where to go,  so I was walking, walking. And suddenly,   I heard someone said, Mirisha? And I said, who are you? And she said,   I am Mira. I am the nurse from your hospital. And  I couldn't remember her, either. And she said,   what are you doing here? I told her. She said, you are not going to go any   further. We are going to take you with us in our  room, and we will share our-- our ration. And   it was a-- a beginning. And-- but I didn't  want to eat from their ration. And I said,   if I cannot work-- because they-- they were  working in a-- in an ambulance. And I say,   if I cannot work in the ambulance, then I'll  go further. And I don't want to eat your bread.  So she convinced-- excuse me. She convinced the  chief [? arts, ?] that I am a good nurse, and   they took me in. And I did get my own rations.

From the time you were liberated by   the Russians, did you make any  attempt to go back to your home? 

Absolutely not. There was no thought about it.

Were you concerned about   any survivors from your family?

I was concerned, but I-- there   was no way that I could find out something.

Was this hospital that you worked in,   was it in the American zone?

It what? 

Was it in the American zone?

The hospital?   This was in Lodz.

No, the hospital when you   had been released from the concentration camp.

Oh, this-- this was a-- in-- in an-- I--   it was in Czechoslovakia. In  Czechoslovakia, when they took   me from-- from the factory to the Czechoslovakia.

Did you end up, then, in an American DP camp? 

Hmm?

Were you in an   American DP camp? Where was that?

This was the-- [PAUSES FOR 7 SECONDS]   when or where?

Where? 

Where? Austria.

This was in the American zone? 

Yes.

How long were you there? 

Three years.

Did you find   anyone from your home in this camp?

No. And we were sending out messages   and names. We couldn't find anybody.

Were you married at this time? 

No. I met my husband in that camp, DP camp.

And you were married in the camp then? 

Yes.

How long did you stay in that camp? 

Three years.

And where did you go from that point? 

We-- they send-- they-- they-- they  emptied-- they want to empty the camp,   and they sent people wherever they want to go. And  we didn't have nowhere to go, neither my husband,   neither I. So they sent us to the United States.  They said, either you'll go to the United State or   to Australia. And we said, whatever comes  first, we'll go. So America came first. 

Did you have any family in this country?

Yes, one cousin-- my husband's cousin. 

And where did they live?

They lived in New York. 

How did you end up in Omaha, Nebraska?

It was-- they send us.   Because they-- they tried to disperse  the people. We came through to the UNRRA,   and then they tried to disperse the people where  they can work. So they said that in Omaha you can   find a job. And he found a job at the Studebaker.

Did you have any children before you came to   this country?

Alex. 

Alex was born--

In-- in displaced   person camp. I showed you pictures.

And he came here with you,   then, as a child?

Yes, one year old. He was   one year old when we came to New York.

And Alex lives in Omaha today? 

All the time.

Is he married? 

Yes. This is his children.

He has children. How many   children does he have?

Three. 

Three children. And your husband passed away?

My husband passed away in 19-- either   '89 or '90-- several years ago.

These experiences have left   quite a mark on your life, haven't they?

God in heaven. I don't think that I   could carry anymore.

Do you think a   lot about those times?

It comes to you. It   affects-- it-- it's a weight in you. And sleep,  you cannot sleep. I am suffering from headaches   all the time. My-- I-- I am on medication. I am  not well, and [PAUSES FOR 5 SECONDS] the end of   life. [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] A rich life.

Have you enjoyed your life in Omaha? 

There were times when I enjoyed,  yes. When I was able to help my husband,   when I was able to have people in my house, when  we-- we had a house, and somebody guarantee that   we will pay. And I was working around the  house. And everything which we had, it was   a-- a blessing from God. And we worked very hard.

Have you ever wondered why you survived and   the other members of your family didn't survive?

I know I don't have the   answer. [PAUSES FOR 3 SECONDS] Now--

Has this experience affected your-- 

The-- the letter to God.

Has this experience affected your religion? 

No.

Have you always had a strong belief in God? 

Yes.

And you're attending a synagogue currently? 

Yes.

Is there anything you would like to add,   in thinking back of those times?

What? 

Any advice you would like to give someone?

Be good to one another. Don't envy.   Don't want too much. Be honest. Be decent. This is my letter to God. A letter to you can   only have a beginning. But the end, only when we  finish our task here on Earth. In the first place,   I want to thank you for the life you have given  me, and for the ability to see and enjoy the   myriad of wonders you have created, for growing up  and growing older, for my dear parents, brothers,   and sisters, and the rest of my wonderful  relatives; for the friends of my childhood and the   present ones; for my dear husband and son whom we  tried to teach through your beautiful laws of the   Ten Commandments, the blueprint of noble conduct. For my new homeland here in the United States,   after the horrible experiences and losses during  the Holocaust period. For the renewed faith in   people, though I will never comprehend how one  created in your image could turn to an animal   state of bestiality and hate. If I would try  to go into details, I would have to thank you   for the air I breathe, the earth I walk on, all  heavenly stars, mountains, trees, water, flowers,   grass. There is no end of things you created. Now, the second part of my letter will   be questions which I don't expect to  understand, for I have only a limited brain,   and your magnificent design is your greatness.  Why does a child die before he has a chance   to experience life's treasures? Why is the  one deformed-- deformed, while another wins   a beauty contest? Why is one blessed with  many abilities, while others are retarded?  Why is one lucky to be outside of a troubled area,  while others are caught in the middle? Why does   one make it, while the other one fails? And on,  and on, and on. As long as I cannot find answer,   I shall try to make my choices according to my  abilities and the circumstances I am in-- to love   or hate, to struggle through or to give up, to be  of use or to take advantage of others. All this,   amid the strong current of emotion to take the  easy road just to make life easier for myself,   and to conquer evil inclination. To relieve my conscience, I can put the   blame on you, dear God, but I love you too much,  and the faith I have in you carries me over the   most painful experiences in my life. In  closing my letter to you, I will ask you   to be with me to the end of my days, as I hear  you in my heart. Yours forever, Miriam, daughter   of my beloved parents, bless their memory. This is my picture from the wedding. I am in   the dress, and my husband is close to me with  his face. This is a-- a-- a wedding picture,   which doesn't look like a wedding picture,  but in the circumstances, it was a wedding.   And a lot of friends around.

What year was that? 

This picture was in DP camp, and it was 1947. This is my son, Alex, bris, in 1948, in-- in the--   in Bindermichl, in the camp, Bindermichl. This is my son, Alex.  This is my daughter-in-law, Mary. These are my grandchildren-- Sarah,   in the middle, Joshua on the right side, and  Daniel on the left side. They are adorable.